Parallel Processing

Mrs Vista shows Mr Vista how it is done!

Mr Vista says...

Mr Vista says it as it is and offers a square deal for all, with extra beef!

Join the (downbeat) fun

Now you too can waste your life creating a fictional world of someone wasting theirs! The post-modern genius of it all! Start today.

Everything you need is crammed into 2meg of vista-ry goodness*. Get it here progress bar fans. Download today - now with extra outer-glow and drop shadow.

With the mirth-some first file you can add a progress bar to whatever you like. What do you want to see counting down? Your status in society? The equity of your house? Perhaps your youth? Or the respect of your love ones as you spend increading hours in front of the computer.

But wait. The best is yet to come. With the giggle-lious second file you put yourself into the little blue circle - just like the V man himself. Do it for your 'friends' to make cheap birthday cards. Or perhaps, being a Mr Vista fan, you don't have any friends. In which case do it to your own picture and send it in to mrvista (at) projectorfilms (dot) com. We'll ridicule your efforts instead.

*Excluding a very expensive copy of Photoshop required to use the damn things.

Hitting the buffers

Mr Vista hits the buffers
Uploaded by MrVista

Yes. That's right. Even progress must come to the end. And so the first series of Mr Vista draws to a close. 100% complete.

That means our lives can return to normal. No more mocking Mr Vista and his pathetic girly-slaps at the IT age. No more looking at ourselves and realising we were no better. No more waiting for Microsoft to knock on my door. No more ridiculous excuses as to why none of these damn films actually have a conclusion.

We are free. Free from Mr Vista and the crushing weight of his spot-on ridicule of our meaningless lives.

It's over. Finished. Shut down without installing updates.

See you next time.