Free set of Mr Vista Emoticons

Roll up, roll up! Get you free set of nerdy MSN* chat emoticons. Yes! You too can appear a full on nerd in front of your friends, peers, colleagues and flirt buddies. If that is your thing - and I should hope that it is.

Why simply have the letters LOL appear when instead they see this... Hilarity ensured. Be popular instantly!

Download the full set of MSN chat emoticons here. Some chat programs allow you to install this package as a zip straight in. If you can do it this way then you will find the right picture is already attached to the right phrase. Easy!

*other types of chat programs are also welcome

Mr Vista tells it as it is

After last weeks 'adventure' Mr Vista felt that perhaps some clarity was needed around this whole internet do-dah. So here is his latest easy to use guide. Learn! Before it is too late.

This is another waste of time

Thank goodness people have been using the new and unique Mr Vista time wasting device - the doodle pad. Otherwise it would have been a waste of time making it! Get your copy here.

This is a waste of time

Mr Vista is a waste of time. It wastes my time. And I hope it wastes yours too.

But why leave that to luck??? Watch your own working life tick away with the brand new (and colourful) Mr Vista doodlepad. Keep it on your desk to ensure that your brain power goes into the void that is vista - and not work.

Count down the minutes until home time - just like the blue hatted twat himself! Genius.

Print a new one everyone!

The best quality image is available here.

Help with Vista

Some people are struggling with understanding Mr Vista.

Do we ignore these people and ridicule them? Yes. But after that invite them to look at this picture. It is a guide to mr vista, a help file in pictorial fashion, a comedy picture about a character based upon a certain Microsoft product from which people may derive humour, a joke, a gag from simple spoofs.

Anyway, now that I've finished trying to get this post to show up on Google searches better by jamming in loads of words just enjoy the pic above. Oh, and 'Bill Gates'!

NOT 'Evolution of Dance'

Mr Vista evolved from this episode...



But what of evolution of man? Note: If you want a proper Darwin poster on evolution click here



Ever feel like you are not getting anywhere? Feel as if your life is in a rut? In fact you are in a rut. And the daylight barely glints down into the muddy swill you live it? Yes!

Well worry no more! The above diagram, if studied correctly, will aid your concerns and soothe your woes. Yes. At last. The Mr Vista guide to evolution. As any foole can see it clearly highlights that no one is getting anywhere and they never will. Hurrah. Everyone else is as screwed as you. Rejoiceth one and all.


Picture stolen from here.

Big version here.

Parallel Processing

Mrs Vista shows Mr Vista how it is done!

Mr Vista says...

Mr Vista says it as it is and offers a square deal for all, with extra beef!

Join the (downbeat) fun

Now you too can waste your life creating a fictional world of someone wasting theirs! The post-modern genius of it all! Start today.

Everything you need is crammed into 2meg of vista-ry goodness*. Get it here progress bar fans. Download today - now with extra outer-glow and drop shadow.

With the mirth-some first file you can add a progress bar to whatever you like. What do you want to see counting down? Your status in society? The equity of your house? Perhaps your youth? Or the respect of your love ones as you spend increading hours in front of the computer.

But wait. The best is yet to come. With the giggle-lious second file you put yourself into the little blue circle - just like the V man himself. Do it for your 'friends' to make cheap birthday cards. Or perhaps, being a Mr Vista fan, you don't have any friends. In which case do it to your own picture and send it in to mrvista (at) projectorfilms (dot) com. We'll ridicule your efforts instead.

*Excluding a very expensive copy of Photoshop required to use the damn things.

Get it

As featured in the previous video - don't forget you can be equally as depressed about life by owning your own Mr Vista calendar. Get it today and marvel and simple lack of any design or pictures. Wow. Post modern and ironic.

Mr Vista - the devil is in the detail

After last weeks loss of the progress bar, ITS BACK. Loads of them.

Behold the incredible detail of the official Mr Vista poster. Have it as a wallpaper / desktop. Print it out. Whatever.

Blogger won't allow the full glory to shine through as they limit the size of pictures. So to get the full 4804x3456 pixel version. Go here.

See your own life slicing away

YES! Now you too can enjoy watching your life slicing away one pixel at a time. In real time!!! Except instead of blocky old pixels you can count away the days.

Available now, and about 2 months too late to be of any use, it's the Mr Vista calendar. Give it to your boss with a cryptic 'get fired' note written in for 4 months time. Give it to an elderly relative so they are reminded of their impending demise. Or even better - keep it for yourself in the vain attempt that people will think you actually made it yourself and are creative.

Whatever you do with it. Download it today. Or maybe tomorrow. Or maybe never.

The Mr Vista 2008 Calendar. Because witnessing the futility of your own existence has never been so much fun!

Please note. This is a 7 meg download. So get extra progress bar excitement watching it download!"